Why I Left The Group “Christians for Biblical Equality”

I used to belong to a Facebook group called “Christians for Biblical Equality”, which is an extension of a larger organization with the same name. After several months of participating in discussions and reading the articles people posted, I made the decision to leave CBE.

If you didn't know me, you might assume I made that decision because I've become ultra-conservative and I don't believe women should ever have any leadership roles in the church. That couldn't be any further from the truth. I didn't leave the group because I don't believe in equality. I left the group because I believe in equality wholeheartedly, and I did not find true equality in CBE.

If you tell someone they have to dress immodestly and show their hair because “this isn't the 50's”, you are not promoting equality. Whether you realize it or not, you are promoting the lies of our male-dominated, hyper-sexualized society. If you tell a woman that they cannot stay home or make the decision to work part-time in the interest of balancing work and life, you are not promoting feminism or liberation. If anything, you are promoting the opposite. Forcing all women into the workplace is just as oppressive as forcing all of them to stay home.

Another reason I left the group was because a lot of people in the group had extremely anti-Semitic attitudes. I found this out when I mentioned that Jewish teachings on modesty and head covering carry more merit for me than Christian teachings.  I could not believe the ridiculous stereotypes that some Christians believe about Jews and Judaism. Without Judaism, there would be no Christianity, so my patience for anti-Semitism within the church/Christian subculture is nonexistent.

If you're reading this and you're a Christian who believes in equality, do yourself (and everyone else) a huge favor: Leave the CBE group if you're in it, and do some soul searching and some research and learn about true equality. It will change your life!

Three Little Words That Christians Can't Bring Themselves to Say

If there's one thing kids love to do, it's ask questions. Kids want to know how things work, and why they work the way they do. If I can answer questions honestly, I don't hesitate to do so. But sometimes kids ask more complicated questions, and the honest answer is “I don't know.”

Why are those three little words taboo amongst adults? Why do we insist on fabricating explanations for things when we haven't the faintest idea why people are injured or killed in car accidents, or why women miscarry, or why people get cancer when they have healthy lifestyles?

Recently I had a conversation with a twelve-year-old girl who wanted to know why people are always shooting each other and why isn't anyone doing anything to stop this? I sighed from the depths of my being, looked her in the eye, and said, “I don't know, kiddo. I don't have an answer that will satisfy either one of us.”

As someone who didn't grow up going to church, and as someone who is getting more and more disillusioned with westernized Christianity, I can tell you why more and more people are leaving churches. Church is no longer a safe place to ask honest questions or say “I don't know.”

The Secret To A Healthy Marriage

I've been happily married for almost three years. I'm always getting asked how I do it, what my secret is.

Well, listen up, because I'm about to tell you THE SECRET of having a happy, healthy marriage! Here it is:

Stop worrying about divorce.

I mean it. Stop. Worrying. About. Divorce.

We've got this idea in the Christian subculture that we can prevent divorce by worrying, talking, and writing about it incessantly. We scare the daylights out of engaged and newlywed couples with our lectures about how they have to have a good marriage because “G-d hates divorce.”

Yes, G-d is not a fan of divorce. He's also not a fan of lunacy, and I'd say that using fear to try to control other people is definitely heading in that direction. Heart attacks can kill people, but we don't try to prevent them by worrying about them incessantly. We prevent them by keeping our bodies as healthy as possible.

It's not any different for marriage. You have a healthy marriage by doing the things that keep it healthy. Keep the lines of communication open. Work through and own your own crap. Laugh. Make mistakes. Give second chances. If you're spending all your time and energy investing in your marriage, you won't have extra energy or brain space for worrying about divorce.

(Note: When I say “G-d is not a fan of divorce”, I am referring to situations where one or both people just give up on the relationship. I am not talking about divorce in the case of domestic violence. If you are in an abusive situation, please get the help you need! I

Identity Theft

For the past year or so, I have been growing more and more disgusted with the westernized church. In that time frame, my negative experiences with professing Christians have far outnumbered the positive ones. There are many problems plaguing the western church, and I will write about them as G-d gives me the words. The problem I want to talk about right now is identity theft.

No, I'm not talking about credit card theft. I'm talking about spiritual identity theft. For most of my Christian life, I have wanted to throw up whenever someone told me I needed to “get rooted in my identity in Christ.” I always thought that was because I was battling spiritual warfare, and once I got through that, I would find my identity in Christ and we'd all live happily ever after. I soon realized, however, that my problem was not that I didn't know who I was in Christ. My problem was that many of my fellow believers thought my identity belonged to them. “Getting rooted in my identity in Christ” was usually a euphemism for “Attend this group you don't have time or energy for. Take on this service project even if it makes you dead tired. Read this book. If you don't want/can't afford said book right now, I will question your salvation and your desire to know G-d.” As I've become progressively Messianic in my spirituality, “You need to get rooted in your identity in Christ” has become a euphemism for, “If you knew who you were in Christ, you wouldn't be so obsessed with Judaism.”

Spiritual identity theft is growing for a number of reasons. A big reason is fear. I see more fear inside the church than outside it these days. Christians simply don't trust anymore. We've become so afraid of sin that we think the only way to get a handle on it is to take away everyone else's free will and individuality. Another reason that kind of goes along with that is negativity. Christians focus more on what not to do than on what to do. And this hyper-focus on negativity is leading to micro-managing other people's spiritual lives in areas that might not be as simple and black-and white as we'd like to believe.

There are certainly times to ask for and give advice. But we need to give advice without snatching people's dignity. When people give us advice, we need to filter it through Scripture and the Holy Spirit and discern how to apply that advice in a way that works for our lives and our true, G-d-given identities. We need to approach the subject of identity in such a way that we do not commit identity theft.

Fasting From Self-Loathing

I have a love-hate relationship with the Lenten season, to be honest. I don't hate it, and most of the time it's spiritually meaningful to me. But I'm starting to have serious issues with this whole idea of giving something up for Lent. Maybe giving something up can be meaningful for some people, and if it is, I have no judgment against that. But are we giving these things up because G-d is leading us to, or because “everyone else is doing it?”

To be honest, giving up the things that most people give up for Lent (or, in some cases, try to give up) would not enhance my life or my spirituality in any significant way. I am a recovering anorexic, so any type of food fast would be a HORRIBLE idea. I run an Etsy shop, so fasting from the internet is out. I don't drink coffee that often, but on days I need it, you don't want to be around me until I've had it. So there goes that.

This year I was trying to discern if/how G-d was leading me to observe Lent this year, and He had an idea that blew my mind.

G-d asked me to give up self-loathing.

And I'll be honest: most of the time I'm simply trying to give up self loathing, but you know what? It's already life-changing. I can stand to be around myself. Heck, I actually like myself some of the time! I'm not plagued with that feeling of “Ugggh, I'm everywhere I go, I can't get away from myself!”

Now I'm not going to lie: Giving up self loathing, ok, trying to give up self-loathing is Freakin'. Hard. It's not as tangible as giving up coffee or the internet. It's as counter-cultural as you can get, and boy will you feel that. But this is important, because self-loathing is both extremely common and fatal. Think about it. You don't become suicidal if you love yourself.

After I posted on Facebook that I'm giving up self-loathing, a friend suggested the idea of taking something up for Lent, not just giving something up. I decided I'm taking up self-love.

Or rather, I'm trying to! ;)

Can The Bible Become An Idol?

One of my Facebook friends asked a very interesting question: Can the Bible ever be an idol? The answers people gave were very well-thought out, with a wide variety of opinions. This is such an interesting and important question that I wanted to mull over it some more and share it on my blog.

My short answer to that question is yes, in my opinion, it absolutely can become an idol. My definition of an idol is something that brings you further away from G-d instead of closer to Him. Going by that definition, anything could be an idol, and that would include the Bible.

(I'm going to stop here and say that, while the subject of distorting Scripture to justify atrocities is certainly an important one, it's a different subject altogether so it's best saved for another day.)

How we handle our interpretations of the Bible says a lot about whether or not we are idolizing it. Someone who doesn't idolize the Bible has no fear of being “wrong” or of someone disagreeing with them. A person who is idolizing the Bible is terrified of being wrong. They'll say things like, “Drinking is wrong because the Bible says so,” and they won't leave any room for the other common interpretation of those verses that say it's getting drunk, not drinking, that's immoral. That is idolatry because it puts pride above connection with G-d and connection with other believers.

I would also say that our approaches to reading the Bible can also help determine whether or not we are idolizing it. While I wholeheartedly agree that most Christians don't read the Bible anywhere near as often as they should, our antennas should go up if someone tells us we “have” to read it in a certain way, for a certain length of time, and at a certain time of day. (Why no, this is not at all a direct reference to all those “experts” who say you must pray and read the Bible every morning like clockwork! :P) Imagine how life would be if we approached our relationships with our spouses and our friends that way! Our relationships with each other are not one size fits all, and our relationships with G-d are the same way.

I would love to hear what you all have to say on this subject! :)

Silence Is Golden. So Shut Up!

I'm really trying hard to not complain about things that, in the grand scheme of things, don't really matter. But what happened today does not fit that description by any means. I am so hurt and horrified by what happened today. And I was even more horrified when some of you mentioned on Facebook that you'd had similar experiences.

I was at the Starbucks in a Barnes and Noble. As the cashier was ringing up my coffee, she asked if I wanted to purchase any gift cards. When I told her “no thanks”, she then asked if I wanted to purchase one of the books on the counter, explaining that the proceeds from those books went toward providing books for disadvantaged children. Had money allowed, I would have happily purchased ten of those books. But it just wasn't in the budget this time around, so I gave another polite “No, thanks.”

I have never experienced anything like what happened next. She asked me if I was serious, and how could I be so selfish. At the time I couldn't do anything other than pick up my coffee without saying a word and just walking over to an empty table. I was in too much shock and I had too much other stuff on my mind to really process it.

But now it's several hours after the fact, and I want to share what I wish I'd have been able to say to her:

“You met me five minutes ago. You don't know anything about me. You don't know that I've been to hell and back. You don't know all the choices I've made in my life. I've made some stupid ones, but I've also made some incredibly selfless ones. If I say I can't afford a book right now, you have no business calling me a liar. I have been in your life for exactly five minutes, if that. If you are a Christian, your behavior today is a stain on the honor of what it means to represent Christ. I suggest you reread the story about the widow and the copper coins.

Since you clearly had nothing nice to say, the nicest thing you could have done was shut up.”

And the thing that really pisses me off is, I can be plenty judgmental. So if someone is judgmental enough to make me look good, I don't know what that says about them. We really need to stop judging people. I'm saying this to myself as much as anyone else.

And if we slip up and judge someone, let's at least have the common sense not to let it come out of our mouths.

The Importance of the National Missionary Movement

I know I haven't written about spiritual things in awhile. That's mostly because I've been thinking about and researching the way the Westernized church (read: the white church) has always done things, and I've come to some conclusions that I know won't be popular. But Christianity is supposed to be about truth, not popularity. Therefore, I have a moral obligation to share these things.

The issue I'm going to tackle in this post is mission work. I'm not saying we shouldn't do it. But the WAY we do it needs serious work. Mission work needs to be about people, not personal agendas. I stumbled upon this article. It's entitled “10 Reasons Not to Become a Missionary".” In my experience, these seem to be the 10 most common reasons why people become missionaries.

After learning about the national missionary movement through Gospel For Asia, I'm convinced this is the way to go in most cases. Right now, I wouldn't say I think we should NEVER send Western missionaries overseas, but I do think it should be the last resort, not the first. Christianity was never intended to be the “white man's religion.” It's still perceived that way in countries that were colonized by the US and Europe.

I'm not going to elaborate on why national missionaries are the way to go. The GFA website explains all that, and it's pretty simple. I want to focus on the bigger question of why we aren't spending more time, energy, and resources on national missionaries. I know there's not a simple answer to that, but I want to share my theories, because I've given this a lot of thought, and it's important.

We have a savior complex here in the American church. We get it into our heads that other countries have problems that only we have the solutions to. Are we serious?! Wake up and smell the bullshit! We have plenty of our own problems! Saving people is a job we are not qualified for! Our job is to lead them to the only One who can save them. And that can't happen until we buck up and put G-d and people before our own selfishness.

Stomping Out the Word "Deserve"

The word “deserve” is possibly one of the most overused words in the Christian subculture. People have so many opinions on what we don't deserve because of original sin, or what we do deserve because Christ lives in us. We can spin scripture to “prove” that we do or don't deserve pretty much whatever we want.

And that's why we really need to be done with the word “deserve.” Can we really know, with absolute certainty, what we do or don't deserve in this life? Some people think so, but I've come to the conclusion that said people are a few grapes short of a fruit salad on this one. People have so many different definitions of “deserve” that it's become too subjective to be any sort of barometer for our behavior.

We need to ask ourselves what we legitimately need, and we need to get those needs met, regardless of whether or not others think we “deserve” it. I need rock-solid stability in my life after everything I've been through. I need work-life balance. (Think running an Etsy shop isn't work? Ha! Think again!) I need to make time for things that actually make me feel good, not just things that seem “productive” to me. I need to find that delicate balance between getting enough social interaction and not wearing out the “innie” half of my “ambi-vert” personality. I need knitting, writing, and art like a diabetic needs insulin.

Do I “deserve” any of those things? I honestly don't know. You could say I deserve them because I'm a “good” person, or you could say I don't because I'm a “bad” person. But I don't think it's that simple. There are very few people who are ALL good or ALL bad. And because of that, I don't know if I deserve any of these things. But I know I need them.

A Word About Expectations

This post is about as close to discussing my political views as I'm going to get.  Generally, I try to focus more on social justice than politics.  (And no, they are not the same thing, but that's a whole other topic.)  It's not that I don't have political views.  I assure you, I do.  But I don't identify with a specific party, and if you're a Christian and not a Republican, some Christians treat you like the antichrist.  So trying to have a discussion doesn't usually get me anywhere.  But I'm getting so fed up with all the heat around the topics of health care and same-sex marriage that I'm going to explode if I don't say something. 

Ultimately, it's about expectations.  You're probably wondering what expectations have to do with politics.  Expectations have EVERYTHING to do with politics!  

Expectations are the backbone of our viewpoints.  For example, many people who oppose health care reform do so because they believe that abortion is immoral. Their expectation is that people should not have abortions.  They believe more people will fail to meet this expectation if it's not legally enforced.  Another example is the issue of same-sex marriage.  Generally, people who oppose it do so on the grounds of believing (having an expectation) that marriage is between a man and a woman.  

Do I have my views on these subjects?  Goodness, yes!  But I don't attach the same expectations to them as most people.  I have my viewpoints based on what I believe is "right", but I can't expect someone else to share those views if they don't interpret religious texts the same way as me.  If there's one thing I've learned, it's that people will find ways to do what they want, to carry out what they will believe in, and there's only so much the government can do about it.  

That concludes the first (and probably last) politically-oriented entry on this blog.  I care more about people than politics.  But again, I had to say something.

Christians and Movie Choices: My Two Cents

Christians tend to lump movies, books, and music into the category of “media choices” and use the same barometer for all of them: If it's produced by a Christian company, it's okay. If it's produced by a secular company, it's not. This is absolute bunk, to put it mildly. It's not that simple, as much as we might want it to be.

With movies, I am more interested in WHY a particular movie contains violence, profanity, etc, than whether or not it contains those things. In general, I am not opposed to movies that dipict violence in order to make a point, such as “Hotel Rwanda,” “Mississippi Burning,” or “The Devil's Arithmatic.” I firmly believe that older children and teenagers should watch such movies when their parents decide they're old enough. In showing them these movies, we are not glorifying violence. We are showing them what can happen when humans inflict it on each other.

I do have a problem with violence just for the sake of violence. I got to a point where I felt like CSI falls too close to this end of the spectrum to continue watching it. With a lot of the action/adventure movies out there, it's kind of a tossup where they fall on the spectrum. I take it on a case-by-case basis.

Other than the examples I just gave, I don't feel the need to get into more specific details about what movies and shows I've chosen to watch or not watch, because that's exactly my point. I'm not you. I don't know for sure what's okay for you and what you need to avoid. We need to own our own choices, and that may mean that two sincere Christians come to two different conclusions in a given situation.

Things Jesus Did NOT Say In Telling Us To Love Our Neighbors

For awhile now, I’ve noticed a really disturbing trend, both in myself and in the church at large.  We are adding to Jesus’ commandment to love our neighbors.  Here are some of the most common “additions” I’ve seen so far:

-“Love your neighbor only if they’re straight and are vehemently opposed to gay marriage.”

-“Love your neighbor only if they vote the way you do.”

-“Love your neighbor only if they interpret every last ounce of Scripture EXACTLY the way you do.”

We are called to love whoever G-d puts in front of us.  Loving them means acknowledging that G-d created them, and they are precious to Him.

Loving them means taking the log out of our own eyes, separating people from their issues, and admitting that we can’t possibly know everything about what causes same-sex attraction.  Loving our neighbors means embracing them as the individuals that they are.  Loving our neighbors means letting go of expectations and meeting them where they're at.

If Jesus wanted to create exceptions to the “love your neighbor” commandment, He would have.

But He didn’t.

Which means we don’t get to.

The Comparison Addiction

The idea of comparing ourselves to others is not new.  Heck, “thou shall not covet” made it into the 10 Commandments, for crying out loud.  Isn’t coveting really just code for comparing ourselves to others?  Maybe we don’t always get jealous of physical possessions or apperance.  Maybe we’re jealous of more abstract things, like strengths and character traits.  I’m having one of those moods where my personality feels like a cosmic joke, and I wish I could be anyone else.  Thanks to Facebook, Pinterest, and Instagram, comparison just got a lot easier, and a lot more addicting.

Yes, addicting.  Comparison is, essentially a spiritual drug addiction.  It impairs our judgment and our ability to make sound choices.  We lose our true selves to who we think we “should” be.  We know it’s bad for us, but we keep wanting more. 

If the church looked at comparison as a drug addiction, how would that change the way we see ourselves and everyone else?  Gotta wonder…

Why I Blog

Every so often I try to work on one of the two books that are currently rolling around in my head, and I’m starting to come to the conclusion that writing a book is not for me, at least at this point in my life.

My reasoning for not wanting to publish a book right now is two-fold.  First of all, in order to get a book published, it has to be VERY good.  The competition is fierce.  Frankly, I don’t care whether or not my writing is good or bad.  I don’t do a blog because I want to be a good writer.  I do a blog because I want to be an honest writer.  I write what needs to be said.  Whether it’s good or bad is completely irrelevant.

Second of all, I hate the idea of someone not being able to read what I write because they can’t afford to buy my book.  Sure, I could write a book and it could end up in some library somewhere, but libraries don’t have every book.  Not being able to afford books is a bigger setback than most people realize.  I’ve gotten several messages from people telling me how much they appreciate what I write.  It’s such a joy to be able to share this gift with others.  I don’t want anyone to be deprived of that because they can’t afford to buy a book.  I’m playing around with the idea of putting a PayPal button on my blog, since I do put a considerable amount of work into it, and it would be nice to have a little more money to work with.  But the difference between that and selling a book is I wouldn’t be making people pay for it.  I would be asking them.  

Religion and Spirituality: Two Sides of the Same Coin

 Just about everyone, at one time or another, has been asked the question “Are you religious?” Christians have been conditioned to balk at this question and retaliate with the classic “Christianity is a relationship, not a religion” without really trying to meet the other person where they are.  I used to be a proud member of the relationship brigade, but I’ve officially turned in my badge.

People who do not identify as religiously affiliated don’t have the same association with the word “religious” that some Christians have.  We take offense at the word “religion” because of all the ways Christian rituals have been distorted and misused.  We’re ready to jump all over this person before they can accuse us of being a hypocrite.  But I’ve learned from experience that people who ask that question out of curiosity seldom look at organized religion through that lens.

 Therefore, giving the knee-jerk response of “Christianity is a relationship, not a religion” is likely to confuse people more than explain where we’re actually coming from.

If we’re being honest with ourselves, all Christians are religious to some extent, whether we think of ourselves that way.  Yes, Christianity stems from having a living, breathing relationship with G-d, but we are physical beings.  So we manifest our non-physical spirituality through physical means.  Going to church, celebrating Communion, and bowing your head when you pray are all religious expressions, because they are outward actions that stem from inward beliefs.

This Article Made Me Hit The Roof

A friend of mine recently posted an article about actress Julie Harris’ death.  Read it here.  I got REALLY angry after I read this.

Most of you are probably wondering what is so offensive about this article.  What’s offensive is that Ms. Harris did a phenomenal job as Betsie Ten Boom in “The Hiding Place”, and People magazine made no mention of it because it was about Christians and produced by a Christian film company.  What’s offensive is that they would have mentioned it if it had been produced by a secular film company.  “The Hiding Place” is, hands down, one of the best films I’ve ever seen, Christian or secular.  It’s an extremely positive depiction of Christian faith in action.  I find it extremely offensive that a journalist would avoid giving Ms. Harris due credit for this role for fear of offending any non-Christians who might read it.

What's in a Name?

 As is the case with most teenagers, I had a lot of issues with organized religion before I became a Christian.  The main issue I had was this idea of naming G-d.  Regardless of people’s belief systems, I didn’t understand how anyone could think that there’s any name that could fully scratch the surface of this infinite life source. 

After going to church for 9 years, I realized I STILL have issue with some aspects of organized religion, and especially with this idea of naming G-d.  It’s not so much that I think people SHOULDN’T try to name G-d or meditate on the various names found in Scripture.  I just really hate the idea of settling for that, as if that’s all there is. 

And that is why I am going back to writing G-d instead of spelling out the word.  I’m not going to write out the whole word because there is no way we can get the whole picture of who He is on this side of eternity.

Christians and Music Choices

 Within the church, there seem to be two polarized viewpoints on Christian music.  On one end of the spectrum, you have this idea that Christians should only listen to Christian stuff.  On the other end is the idea that that stuff is outdated and no one in their right mind should listen to any of it.

When I first became a Christian, I subscribed to the former viewpoint.  When Christian friends began to make fun of me for listening to only Christian music, I followed their lead and didn’t listen to any Christian music, even though I truly liked a lot of it.

After spending a few years in each camp, I’ve decided that both sides are right.  And both sides are wrong.

There is certainly nothing inherently harmful about listening to Christian music.  I’ll readily admit that there’s a lot of junk out there, and Christian music can be a viable alternative.  But I have issue with the idea of presenting Christian music as the only alternative.  I’ve come to the conclusion that that’s bad theology.  Philippians 4:8 reads as follows:

^“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (NIV)

Both of these extreme viewpoints are in violation of this verse.  If everything on your Ipod is laden with colorful metaphors, you are not dwelling on things that are right or pure.  At the same time, to say that Christian music is the only music that fits this description is to miss out.  

My stance on movies is similar in some ways but there are some exceptions, so I'll have to do another post on that at some point.

What I Want Pastors and Church Leaders to Know about Divorce Kids

This is the next installment in what I hope will become a series of posts on divorce and divorce kids.  Personally, I think all of this information is good for everyone, regardless of their role in the church.  But this post contains the bullet points that are especially important for pastors and church leaders.

1.)  We exist.  There is no such thing as a church that doesn’t have any divorce kids.  If you think your church doesn’t have any, it’s because people are ashamed to admit it.  With divorce rates being what they are, it’s next to impossible to have a church that doesn’t have any DK’s.

2.)  We need a voice, and a safe place to use it.  The church was not designed to be a fortress designed to keep sin out.  It was designed to function as a spiritual hospital for sinners.  The church has, thankfully, become a place where more and more people are able to safely open up about addictions and other issues.  For the most part, the church continues to be a dangerous place for divorcees and DK’s to share their stories and their struggles.  This needs to change.

3.)  We value Scripture and the sanctity of marriage as much as you do, even if our interpretations of Scripture aren’t identical to yours.  One of the most common misconceptions that church leaders have had about me as a DK is that I throw the Bible’s teachings on divorce out the window.  This couldn’t be any further from the truth.  When I say that my experience as a DK has changed my interpretation of Scripture, the response should not be to question my salvation, call me a heretic, or accuse me of Gnosticism.  The correct response would be to ask me for my views on this subject before jumping to such ridiculous and inappropriate conclusions. 

My next post on this subject will be for adult DK's in the church.  I will try to get that up hopefully by the end of next week, but I'm juggling a lot of other responsibilities right now.

Different, Inside and Out

If there’s one thing no one wants to be, it’s being thought of as different (in the negative sense of the word.)  Even in the church, people go to great lengths to blend in.  We sugarcoat the tough parts of our theology to avoid offending people.  We don’t want non-Christians to see us as different.

But the thing is, if you are a sincere Christian, you ARE different. You have been adopted into God’s family.  Being different is inevitable.  I’ve been thinking about this for awhile, and I’ve come to the conclusion that you can’t be an authentic person and be everybody’s friend at the same time.  You just can’t.  I would know, I’ve tried.

By now, covering my head has pretty much become second nature.  I think that has a lot to do with accepting the fact that I already felt different before I started covering.  I won’t go into details here, but let’s just say I’ve faced quite a bit of opposition to the way I’m walking out my faith life, opposition from Christians and non-Christians alike.  I’ve felt different from the first day of this journey, and I’ve been realizing that this is not an accident.  On the contrary, it’s exactly how it’s supposed to be!