Why I Left The Group “Christians for Biblical Equality”

I used to belong to a Facebook group called “Christians for Biblical Equality”, which is an extension of a larger organization with the same name. After several months of participating in discussions and reading the articles people posted, I made the decision to leave CBE.

If you didn't know me, you might assume I made that decision because I've become ultra-conservative and I don't believe women should ever have any leadership roles in the church. That couldn't be any further from the truth. I didn't leave the group because I don't believe in equality. I left the group because I believe in equality wholeheartedly, and I did not find true equality in CBE.

If you tell someone they have to dress immodestly and show their hair because “this isn't the 50's”, you are not promoting equality. Whether you realize it or not, you are promoting the lies of our male-dominated, hyper-sexualized society. If you tell a woman that they cannot stay home or make the decision to work part-time in the interest of balancing work and life, you are not promoting feminism or liberation. If anything, you are promoting the opposite. Forcing all women into the workplace is just as oppressive as forcing all of them to stay home.

Another reason I left the group was because a lot of people in the group had extremely anti-Semitic attitudes. I found this out when I mentioned that Jewish teachings on modesty and head covering carry more merit for me than Christian teachings.  I could not believe the ridiculous stereotypes that some Christians believe about Jews and Judaism. Without Judaism, there would be no Christianity, so my patience for anti-Semitism within the church/Christian subculture is nonexistent.

If you're reading this and you're a Christian who believes in equality, do yourself (and everyone else) a huge favor: Leave the CBE group if you're in it, and do some soul searching and some research and learn about true equality. It will change your life!

Why Some Social Justice Issues Get All The Hype

I just read an interesting article from Sojourners about how the church is very sex-oriented these days. I wholeheartedly agree with this article. This post is not to criticize the article but rather to take the discussion a step further.

The fact that the church is getting sex-oriented is really a symptom that the church is attention-oriented, in my humble opinion. I would say that there are four main topics that generate a lot of hype in the church today. Those issues are abortion, homosexuality, human trafficking, and overseas mission work. People who participate in activism related to those issues often get a lot of external recognition. People want to support those efforts because they are seen as “worthy causes.” I'm not saying these issues aren't important, but we need to take a look at how we usually handle said issues. The reality is, it's easy to get involved in these areas without asking a lot of tough questions, and without challenging ourselves spiritually.

I'm at the point where I really don't want to read any more articles about those four main topics. Those topics have gotten enough hype. I want to see more articles about suburban and rural poverty, sustainability, and access to mental health services. These issues are just as “moral” as the issues that generate more hype, and yet I hardly ever see articles about them. I've come up with a few reasons why no one cares about these issues:

Reason #1: The solutions are extremely “ordinary” and won't bring you external praise.

One of the most effective ways to get people working together on issues is online petitions. You'd be amazed at the changes that people have brought about through this venue. I've written about the importance of the national missionary movement and how it's a much better alternative to overseas mission work in some cases. But supporting those things won't generate praise from other people, and for many of them, that's reason enough not to bother.

Reason #2: The solutions require us to let go of prejudice. I'm going to come out and say it: I am prejudiced. If you are a member of the human race, you are prejudiced. Period. We all have our pre-conceived ideas about certain types of people and certain ideas. Issues like poverty and mental health are extremely stigmatized. Sadly, I think the subject of mental illness is even more difficult for Christians, since so many of us are buying into the BS idea that mental illness is spiritual in nature and people just need to be freed from demons and whatnot. Talking and thinking about these issues is very uncomfortable because we all have our own pre-conceived ideas of what poverty and mental illness look like, and what causes them. It's very difficult to acknowledge that these issues might look different than what we expect.

Reason #3: People care more about parties than about working together and finding common ground. I know that if I start talking about corporate bailouts and the recent budget cuts to the food stamp program, politically conservative Christians are going to write me off as liberal and ignore me. I am probably ruffling a lot of feathers with this statement but I don't care. People are way too party-oriented, especially in the church. I have lost a lot of Christian friends because I don't vote Republican and don't identify as a specific party. If someone came to me and told me they wanted to work on these issues, I wouldn't care who they voted for in the last election. I would be thrilled that they see me as another human being with good intentions. If we could stop being party-oriented we'd be in much better shape, but I'm not optimistic that it's going to happen any time soon.

List of Battles

If there's one thing humans are good at, it's believing things that aren't true. I could go on and on about how the internet has enabled the perpetuation of BS to reach disturbing heights. But that's a different post for a different day.

Today I'm going to address the misconceptions that I battle just about every day of my life. I'm an odd duck, I admit it. I cover my head. I juggle numerous physical and mental health issues. I'm wired differently and have some places in my brain that just don't “click” like everyone else's. That combination of stuff leads to a lot of misconceptions.

Here are just a few of the misconceptions people have had about me. Yes, people are really this ridiculous:

Myth: I struggle with depression, anxiety, and PTSD because G-d wanted to punish me
Fact: I struggle with all of the above because genetics and environment can suck, and because people have the unfortunate capacity to make choices that screw up other people for life

Myth: Since I cover my head, I must be rigid about gender roles
Fact: yeah, no. Not really. Quite the opposite, actually. (There are so many misconceptions about head covering. I really need to do a separate post about this.)

Myth: Since I am white and have a middle class background, I don't have any problems.
Fact: Ha. Yeah. Right.

Myth: People with learning disabilities just don't think.

Fact: Have you ever been inside my head? I can't shut the darn thing off! Please let me know if you find the off switch so I can catch a break!

Myth: Since I'm a Christian, I'm “anti-gay.”

Fact: Based on my intepretation of Scripture, I cannot accept same-sex attraction as “natural” and therefore do not identify as a “GLBT ally”. However, if your definition of “anti-gay” is turning all Westboro Baptist Church on people who are GLBT, I am not anti-gay, and I most certainly do not condone hate crimes of any kind. I have lost a lot of Christian friends and received some horribly vicious emails due to this radical notion that we are all human beings, and that none of us are a be-all, end-all authority on something as complicated as sexuality.

Myth: Since I'm a Christian, I want all my beliefs to be enforced by the state and national government.

Fact: I've never thought that, and I think it even less so after watching “Persepolis.”

What about you? What are some misconceptions you battle with?

Stupid Questions (With a shot of cynicism and a PSA)

I have a love-hate relationship with the phrase “There is no such thing as a stupid question.” Most of the time, this phrase is said by well-meaning parents and teachers who want kids to feel like no question is off limits. That's a good thing, of course. But it overlooks the fact that some questions are, in fact, hilariously stupid.

Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not talking about asking honest questions in the interest of gathering information. Those questions are not stupid if you think before you ask. I'm talking about asking ridiculous questions that usually stem from false assumptions, questions that you can probably figure out the answer to if you think long enough. Most people who ask stupid questions are not stupid. That's what makes stupid questions so annoying. You're smarter than this, people!

Here are some stupid questions that either I or someone I know have been asked at one time or another:

Question #1: “How can you drive if you're hard of hearing?”

I should make it clear that this is not a stupid question when it's asked honestly and politely. It is, however, a very stupid question when it's asked in a panicked tone, and the person is thinking “Oh my gosh, I can't believe you are out in about driving in your condition without any kind of assistance!” sort of way. Logically, if I was unable to drive safely, I would not be doing it.

Question #2: “How could I have gotten pregnant? I used birth control!”

Um, yeah. There is a very simple answer to this question. One word: biology.

Question #3: “How does the baby breathe during a water birth?”

Obviously, the baby must grow a set of gills before birth and shed them immediately after.

Question #4: “Won't your hearing aids explode if you go through security scanners or metal detectors?”

Isn't that just the darnedest thing? These scanners process computers, phones, and medical devices every day without incident, yet somehow hearing aids are just too much. So my hearing aids prevent me from shopping, going to the library, traveling, or having any kind of life. Sad day!

Question #5: “When are you going to have kids?”

I've reached that point in my marriage where people think it's time to start asking me this question, as if their asking will make me magically have kids. (It also doesn't help that just about everyone and their grandmother is having babies right and left these days, but that's a whooole other discussion.) I really wish I had enough chutzpah to ask these people when they are planning on retiring or dying. Their reaction would be priceless.

Question #6: “Why do you care if I use the word 'retarded' ?”

Okay, so this one isn't hilarious like the others.  In fact, it's pretty serious.  I care about this because under these occasional bouts of cynicism, I am a decent, caring, compassionate human being who knows that the words we use matter, and you are using that word to slander the mental capacity of people with intellectual disabilities. I would care if someone slandered you, and I care when you slander other people.

(Here's the PSA I mentioned: Words mean things. Ditch the word “retarded.”)

"It's Tough Being A Western Woman"

I was watching this 20/20 special on Malala Yousafzai. It seems so cheesy to say it's a great story, but it really is. And for the D/HH crowd, it's captioned!

I'm mentioning this documentary because there's a line in there that really sums up how I understand feminism, dress, and headcovering these days. For anyone who did not watch the special (which you really should, because it's amazing), there's a scene where Diane Sawyer is interviewing some fundamentalist Muslim women who do not agree with Malala's viewpoint. One of the women is talking about how Western women face a lot of pressure and there is so much focus on what body parts are showing. She says, point blank, “It's tough being a Western woman.”

I disagree with the other stuff this woman said. But I am not going to disagree with that. It's tough being a Western woman. It's tough enough that I'm no longer trying to shove myself into a mold I don't fit, this arbitrary standard of what makes an “ideal woman.” I care about the pointless stuff a lot less now that I cover my head and more of my body than I used to. (My style of dress has evolved a bit in the past two years. I'll be writing more about that in another post.) I dress the way I do because it's FREEING! I'm not saying we should make laws that require every woman to dress like this. That wouldn't be freeing. But you have to understand, I feel freer now than I used to. I used to drive myself crazy worrying about my hair. It's “double thick”, meaning the strands are thick and I have a lot of hair. I struggled to get it to do what I wanted. I wasted so much time worrying about it. I ironed, sprayed, and gooped it up way more than was good for it. It's so much simpler to put on a hat or a scarf (or two or three) and leave it at that.

Before I started covering, people defined me by my appearance. My hair and my body attracted a lot of attention. It got to the point where I felt like that's all I was. Wearing a headscarf and covering the outline of my legs sends the message, “Yes, I have a body, but it's not all I am."  That is not an "un-feminist" message to send. 

I'm not going to insist that every woman cover. But I will say, being a Western woman got much easier when I did.

Halloween Costumes and White Privilege

First of all, I'm going to refer to white privilege during this post. If you are unfamiliar with white privilege, I suggest you look it up first. Also, keep in mind that while I did study white privilege for a class in college, I'm by no means an expert on the subject, and I'm not pretending to be.

I stumbled upon this article about a group of college students who are expressing disapproval of some of the Halloween costumes out there. I had shared the article on Facebook and received several different (but equally well thought-out!) responses. There are also a lot of thoughtful, varied comments on the page itself. I wanted to share my thoughts on here. A few people also brought up the interesting question of “Is it okay to dress like witches?” and “Is it okay to dress like Jesus/G-d?” While those are excellent questions, those are separate issues from race, and I'm not going to address them in this post. I might do another post if I have time. I'll have to see; it's going to be a busy week.

A lot of people were in agreement that a white person dressing like a Native American or putting on blackface is inappropriate. But some people didn't see the problem with dressing in Asian or Hispanic costumes like the ones shown in the picture. This was a very thoughtful, respectful discussion for the most part. But I have to wonder how much knowledge and understanding of white privilege went into the discussion.

White privilege is the easiest to identify when you are talking about our historical relations with black people and Native Americans. It can be more subtle, I think, when we're talking about other ethnic groups, because in our white minds, oppression of those groups is not as blatant. I think the reason people think that is because oppression of other races like Asians and Hispanics isn't as well-known. If it was, it would be easier to see that white privilege exists in our relations with other minorities as well.

The subject of costumes is an issue of white privilege when it doesn't add up if you turn the situation around. If someone who wasn't white decided to dress up in a Scandinavian folk outfit as a means of dressing up as a “white person” we would, understandably, take offense. “White culture” is not a homogenous thing. Not every white person is Scandinavian, and that costume does not accurately describe ALL Scandinavians. Racism says that white privilege is irrelevant and it doesn't matter if we do that to non-whites. White privilege says, “It would be wrong if they did it, so it needs to be wrong when we do it.”

The Importance of the National Missionary Movement

I know I haven't written about spiritual things in awhile. That's mostly because I've been thinking about and researching the way the Westernized church (read: the white church) has always done things, and I've come to some conclusions that I know won't be popular. But Christianity is supposed to be about truth, not popularity. Therefore, I have a moral obligation to share these things.

The issue I'm going to tackle in this post is mission work. I'm not saying we shouldn't do it. But the WAY we do it needs serious work. Mission work needs to be about people, not personal agendas. I stumbled upon this article. It's entitled “10 Reasons Not to Become a Missionary".” In my experience, these seem to be the 10 most common reasons why people become missionaries.

After learning about the national missionary movement through Gospel For Asia, I'm convinced this is the way to go in most cases. Right now, I wouldn't say I think we should NEVER send Western missionaries overseas, but I do think it should be the last resort, not the first. Christianity was never intended to be the “white man's religion.” It's still perceived that way in countries that were colonized by the US and Europe.

I'm not going to elaborate on why national missionaries are the way to go. The GFA website explains all that, and it's pretty simple. I want to focus on the bigger question of why we aren't spending more time, energy, and resources on national missionaries. I know there's not a simple answer to that, but I want to share my theories, because I've given this a lot of thought, and it's important.

We have a savior complex here in the American church. We get it into our heads that other countries have problems that only we have the solutions to. Are we serious?! Wake up and smell the bullshit! We have plenty of our own problems! Saving people is a job we are not qualified for! Our job is to lead them to the only One who can save them. And that can't happen until we buck up and put G-d and people before our own selfishness.

A Word About Expectations

This post is about as close to discussing my political views as I'm going to get.  Generally, I try to focus more on social justice than politics.  (And no, they are not the same thing, but that's a whole other topic.)  It's not that I don't have political views.  I assure you, I do.  But I don't identify with a specific party, and if you're a Christian and not a Republican, some Christians treat you like the antichrist.  So trying to have a discussion doesn't usually get me anywhere.  But I'm getting so fed up with all the heat around the topics of health care and same-sex marriage that I'm going to explode if I don't say something. 

Ultimately, it's about expectations.  You're probably wondering what expectations have to do with politics.  Expectations have EVERYTHING to do with politics!  

Expectations are the backbone of our viewpoints.  For example, many people who oppose health care reform do so because they believe that abortion is immoral. Their expectation is that people should not have abortions.  They believe more people will fail to meet this expectation if it's not legally enforced.  Another example is the issue of same-sex marriage.  Generally, people who oppose it do so on the grounds of believing (having an expectation) that marriage is between a man and a woman.  

Do I have my views on these subjects?  Goodness, yes!  But I don't attach the same expectations to them as most people.  I have my viewpoints based on what I believe is "right", but I can't expect someone else to share those views if they don't interpret religious texts the same way as me.  If there's one thing I've learned, it's that people will find ways to do what they want, to carry out what they will believe in, and there's only so much the government can do about it.  

That concludes the first (and probably last) politically-oriented entry on this blog.  I care more about people than politics.  But again, I had to say something.

Things Jesus Did NOT Say In Telling Us To Love Our Neighbors

For awhile now, I’ve noticed a really disturbing trend, both in myself and in the church at large.  We are adding to Jesus’ commandment to love our neighbors.  Here are some of the most common “additions” I’ve seen so far:

-“Love your neighbor only if they’re straight and are vehemently opposed to gay marriage.”

-“Love your neighbor only if they vote the way you do.”

-“Love your neighbor only if they interpret every last ounce of Scripture EXACTLY the way you do.”

We are called to love whoever G-d puts in front of us.  Loving them means acknowledging that G-d created them, and they are precious to Him.

Loving them means taking the log out of our own eyes, separating people from their issues, and admitting that we can’t possibly know everything about what causes same-sex attraction.  Loving our neighbors means embracing them as the individuals that they are.  Loving our neighbors means letting go of expectations and meeting them where they're at.

If Jesus wanted to create exceptions to the “love your neighbor” commandment, He would have.

But He didn’t.

Which means we don’t get to.

The Bullying Epidemic

Bullying is a subject that I hadn’t thought much about until recently, when I saw a discussion about it on a friend’s Facebook wall.  Ever since I read all those posts, I’ve been thinking more about my experiences with being bullied in late elementary and early junior high. 

As for finding a solution to this epidemic, I’ve come to a conclusion that will probably ruffle a lot of feathers: 

Bullying is a complex, societal problem that does not have a “quick fix.”  Most of the ideas I’ve heard from well-intentioned parents and teachers are great in theory, but they don’t always work in practice.  The two most common “solutions” to bullying these days are putting your child in private school and trying to create a school environment where students take a stand against bullying and peer violence.  I can’t say that these solutions never work, because for all I know someone else might have had better luck with them than I did.  But they don’t solve the bigger societal issues that contribute to bullying.

Here are the major problems in a nutshell:

1.)  We don’t practice what we preach.  Parents and teachers tell children that they need to treat each other with respect.  Unfortunately, we live in a world where most adults don’t do that.  If we respected each other, it would come more naturally for our kids, and bullying wouldn’t be anywhere near as common. 

2.)  Most children who turn into bullies have a rough time of it outside the classroom.  I knew enough about my bullies to know that every single one of them was dealing with something major.  Several of them had parents who were going through horrible divorces.  I remember in 5^th grade, one classmate in particular was having awful side effects from an ADHD medication, and he bullied everyone.  With so many students dealing with those kinds of situations, the odds of finding enough students to put together some kind of coalition is slim.

3.)  Even if there was enough interest in such a coalition, there is very little support and protection for students who actually want to take a stand against bullying and peer violence.  I’ve heard countless stories of high school students who were either suspended or threatened with suspension for breaking up fights, or standing up for a friend who was being harassed.  The “zero tolerance” policy isn’t going to work as long as there is also “zero tolerance” for students who actually want to do the right thing. 

I really wish I had an easy answer to the question of how do we stop bullying.  But the truth is, there is no such thing as an easy answer as long as we’ve got these bigger societal issues to contend with. 

Why I Blog

Every so often I try to work on one of the two books that are currently rolling around in my head, and I’m starting to come to the conclusion that writing a book is not for me, at least at this point in my life.

My reasoning for not wanting to publish a book right now is two-fold.  First of all, in order to get a book published, it has to be VERY good.  The competition is fierce.  Frankly, I don’t care whether or not my writing is good or bad.  I don’t do a blog because I want to be a good writer.  I do a blog because I want to be an honest writer.  I write what needs to be said.  Whether it’s good or bad is completely irrelevant.

Second of all, I hate the idea of someone not being able to read what I write because they can’t afford to buy my book.  Sure, I could write a book and it could end up in some library somewhere, but libraries don’t have every book.  Not being able to afford books is a bigger setback than most people realize.  I’ve gotten several messages from people telling me how much they appreciate what I write.  It’s such a joy to be able to share this gift with others.  I don’t want anyone to be deprived of that because they can’t afford to buy a book.  I’m playing around with the idea of putting a PayPal button on my blog, since I do put a considerable amount of work into it, and it would be nice to have a little more money to work with.  But the difference between that and selling a book is I wouldn’t be making people pay for it.  I would be asking them.  

What I Want Pastors and Church Leaders to Know about Divorce Kids

This is the next installment in what I hope will become a series of posts on divorce and divorce kids.  Personally, I think all of this information is good for everyone, regardless of their role in the church.  But this post contains the bullet points that are especially important for pastors and church leaders.

1.)  We exist.  There is no such thing as a church that doesn’t have any divorce kids.  If you think your church doesn’t have any, it’s because people are ashamed to admit it.  With divorce rates being what they are, it’s next to impossible to have a church that doesn’t have any DK’s.

2.)  We need a voice, and a safe place to use it.  The church was not designed to be a fortress designed to keep sin out.  It was designed to function as a spiritual hospital for sinners.  The church has, thankfully, become a place where more and more people are able to safely open up about addictions and other issues.  For the most part, the church continues to be a dangerous place for divorcees and DK’s to share their stories and their struggles.  This needs to change.

3.)  We value Scripture and the sanctity of marriage as much as you do, even if our interpretations of Scripture aren’t identical to yours.  One of the most common misconceptions that church leaders have had about me as a DK is that I throw the Bible’s teachings on divorce out the window.  This couldn’t be any further from the truth.  When I say that my experience as a DK has changed my interpretation of Scripture, the response should not be to question my salvation, call me a heretic, or accuse me of Gnosticism.  The correct response would be to ask me for my views on this subject before jumping to such ridiculous and inappropriate conclusions. 

My next post on this subject will be for adult DK's in the church.  I will try to get that up hopefully by the end of next week, but I'm juggling a lot of other responsibilities right now.

Confessions of a Divorce Kid

 It goes without saying that divorce is an iffy topic in the church today.  Christians who are not divorced are quick to past judgment on those who are divorced.  That in itself is bad enough, but what’s even more pathetic is the treatment I’ve received from some Christians because I am a divorce kid.  As someone who has been a DK for about 17 years and a Christian for 9 years, I’ve got a lot to say on this subject. I’ve boiled it down to a few bullet points.  Here goes:

1.)  Telling me that “God hates divorce” or that you “don’t believe in divorce” is a surefire way to stay off my A-list. If you are not a divorce kid, you have about as much authority on this subject as I would on being a Holocaust survivor.  And yes, God does hate divorce.  He also hates every other sin.  So put down your stones.

2.)  Blended families exist.  Deal with it.  The church has this really annoying habit of overlooking people who don’t come from “traditional” families.  Regardless of your views on gay marriage and family preservation, non-traditional families are a part of reality.  I should not have to explain to adults that I have both biological and step-parents.  Adults should also know better than to ask me if I have “real” parents, or “why don’t I have real parents.”  Sometimes I just want to say “Poke them!  They’re real!”  The fact that I have to ask adults to please use the term “biological parents” and “step-parents” is just sad.

3.)  My parents’ divorce has significantly impacted my life, but it hasn’t destroyed it.  It’s a complete myth that divorce has no impact on children.  It will affect them in ways they won’t completely understand until they hit adulthood. Kids don’t fully understand all the ramifications of divorce. If you’re reading this and you’re a divorced parent, this is especially important for you to keep in mind.  However, it’s very important that you don’t send a DK the message that their life and their future relationships are done for because of their parents’ divorce. 

4.)  The church has, for the most part, failed to be a safe place for DK’s to ask questions and receive support.  I’ve always been more comfortable talking about my parents’ divorce with people who describe themselves as non-Christians or not religiously affiliated.  I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s the case for other Christian DK’s as well.  I wish the church was more supportive, but apparently casting stones is more fun than being supportive and admitting that people are complex and imperfect.

I don’t think the church’s treatment of divorcees and DK’s is just about divorce.  This is just a symptom of the fact that we have turned into a fake church where it’s not okay to be human. I found this article on Sojourners, and I couldn’t have said it better myself!

When Homelessness Has a Name

During the past few weeks, I have been experiencing something that I have no grid for.  I have wanted to share this ever since it started, but I had been holding back for a couple of reasons.  First of all, I wasn’t sure how much I should share about this on the internet.  Second of all, I have been skeptical as to whether or not the readers would be able to wrap their minds around this.  But since M. decided she wants her story out there, I figure I should take the plunge and just tell it like it really happened.

 In the past few weeks, I have developed a friendship with a woman who is homeless. 

 Before this beautiful relationship came into my life, my understanding of homelessness and homeless people was pretty limited.  I have plenty of junk in my background, but I have never been in a place where I needed to worry about having a roof over my head, food to eat, and clothes to wear.  I always had enough.  I grew up surrounded by people who, for the most part, always had enough.  I knew that there were people in the world who did not have enough, who were “down on their luck.”  Like most average middle-class people, I didn’t look at them as being ordinary people in the same sense as me.  I did little things to help here and there, but I’m sad to say that was it for the longest time.

 Then something happened that changed everything.

 Homelessness got a name.  M.  (For security purposes I am using an initial, at least for the time being.)  Once homelessness got a name, it was no longer this abstract condition that affected thousands of people I knew nothing about.  It became a very real problem that was making life a nightmare for this woman and her two children.  Like many women, M is homeless as a result of leaving a domestic violence situation.  Not only do the three of them not have a home, but M is trying to navigate her way through a social service system that is essentially structured to work against the people it’s supposed to serve. 

 As M’s story unfolded, I began to get very angry at the church.  I reached out to several church leaders, in my own church as well as collectively.  For the most part, I was met with indifference.  For the sake of the other members of my congregation, I’m glad I lack the upper body strength needed to flip the tables in the great hall, because this past Sunday I definitely had a “Jesus flipping the tables in the temple” moment.  Both Christian and secular organizations seem to bend over backwards to address socioeconomic problems overseas.  But if you mention homelessness happening in your own state, people look at you like you have three heads.

 At this point, you’re probably wondering, what does she want me to do with all this?  I don’t have a straightforward answer to that question.  You need to search your heart and ask yourself what would be the best course of action.  Maybe you’ll decide to start by educating yourself on homelessness in your state or nation.  Maybe you’ll decide to volunteer at a homeless shelter so you can shatter your stereotypes about homeless people.  Maybe you need to talk with other people who have worked with the homeless in one way or another.  Maybe you need to do more in terms of activism.  Change.org is a great place to start.  I don’t care what you do, but I do want to challenge you to do something. 

 If there was just one thing I want everyone to take away from my interaction with M, it would be this:

 Homeless people are people just like us.  They are no better or worse than people who have a permanent address.  They have likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses.  They have things that make them laugh and things that make them cry.  They have favorite movies and foods.  They have quirks.  They have the same need of companionship and connection.

They are just like us.  So this is a problem that should break our hearts.