I’ve pretty much had it
with this idea that Christians need to be “cool” in order to make the church
more “seeker-friendly.” I don’t
mean to imply that churches shouldn’t be safe, welcoming places for new people. They absolutely should. But when we start sacrificing sound
theology and biblical principles in the name of being “seeker friendly”, we’ve
gone too far.
One aspect of church
ministry that I’ve grown extremely wary about is “young adult ministry.” I was involved in one for a few
years. There were definitely a lot
of positive aspects of it, and that organization was full of wonderful
people. (If you are reading this and you are/were involved in that organization, please take this the way it's intended.) However, I’ve also
noticed some potential downsides of the way most young adult ministries are structured, and I would like to
share said downsides in an honest, constructive way.
The lack of older adult
role models is a huge concern, from where I’m standing. Young adult ministries can sometimes be
hotspots for people who don’t have decent family situations and don’t have
strong role models to look up to.
The problem is that these organizations are not the best place to get
those needs met. Young adults need
friends of all ages, from all walks of life. Young adults need “older” adults in their lives. Sadly, many young adults today don’t
seek out those kinds of relationships because they don’t think they’re
“cool.”
Another issue that
concerns me is a lack of maturity and responsibility in young adults. I wonder
just how many mid-twentysomethings know how to create and stick to a budget,
get out of debt, and be good stewards of their bodies. Call me crazy, but I’m starting to
wonder if the basic infrastructure of most young adult ministries is part of
the problem instead of the solution.
A typical gathering for young adults will last well into the night, and
most of the snacks that are served are unhealthy. Back when I was involved in a young adult group, there were
plenty of messages on the importance of financial responsibility, and very
little information on how to actually BE financially responsible.
Between leaving that
group and wearing more modest clothing, I’m sure there are plenty of people who
think I’m “uncool.” Frankly, I
don’t care anymore. Leaving that
young adult ministry and dressing the way I do have made me into a more
authentic person. I don’t care
about being cool anymore. I care
about being real, mature, and responsible. I may not be cool, but I get plenty of sleep, I eat good
food, I’ve learned how to manage money, and my clothing choices give me a sense
of dignity I’d never had before.
I’ll take that over being “cool” any day!
